Monday, December 26, 2011

The Lost Insane

Inspiration: Thinking about voices in your head
Word: Knew

I never knew
you weren't suppose to hear voices
So I never knew it wasn't okay to talk to them
and I didn't know it wasn't okay to get angry with them
So I thought it was okay to hate them
and I never knew it wasn't okay to hurt them
So I didn't know why everyone was so angry
and said that I must hate
and I never knew
how to hate me
I just always hated how they made me

i.e. Wordist

Inspiration:Thinking about words....its not the greatest poem...
Word: Words

I idolize words
I create worlds for them
only to be destroyed
or abused

Jumping to the Finish Line

Inspiration: I was feeling a sensation through my chest and back
Word: Tunnel

I felt a tunnel being driven through my heart
but I couldn't describe the pain
couldn't discern if it was pain
but sitting stern
I felt my back cave
as the two plates of my spine
broke into pieces
I was open
For a moment
left broken
but ended affirming the fact
that I could now
only be

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Christ Lights

Inspiration: Looking ay my Christmas lights, oh and it's Christmas
Word: Lights

I always loved how Christmas lights
danced across the wall,
Dropping small candy size
bulbs of glee,
Illuminating a simple scene
like Jesus did,
laying in an unfit manger
not made for a king
but sparkling
brightly, tarnishing the ugly of the scene
like the Christmas lights do

The Needy

Inspiration: I feel kinda yucky right now.
Word: Hate

She hated everything
her thoughts were eroded
with the sad color of misery
there was no joy behind her eyes
and she sat there pleading for pity
but only got more grief
she was mistaken for nothing
and took nothing but remorse
her lips were coated shut
with petty sayings and greed
she got nothing
but had everything
yet she cried
in need

A Water Poem

Inspiration:  Going to the beach, and the water being perfectly cold and the day being hot.
Word: Present 

It was a melody of passion
and a cool blue water scent
Sparkling with white diamonds
of pressure pushing stillness
I took heed in it-
and allowed my back to lavish
in the chilly surplus of what it felt like
to release-
I dived in what took away my tension
and allowed the cold
to flow between my legs
I clenched as the sensation entered me
I allowed it to take over my body
and wrap me in a convoluted excellence
I shook shortly as my pores were grazed
with the strong breath of the wind
I took it all in,
and rode the brim of the vibrations
I let the scene wash into me
and forgot all thoughts of
What it meant to exist
I exiled reason
And centered on being

Simple Love

Inspiration: Looking at my thumbs
Word: Fingers

Sometimes my fingers flirt
They fidget and graze
And touch and embrace
Just like humans do,
my fingers interlock, 
humans do that too-
we call it lovin' 
fingers call it touchin'

Sunshine Poem

Inspiration: Looking at the colors on my blouse
Word: Sunshine

I wish I could create sunshine
Because I would lay her in my tub
and soak her in
I’d breathe still
and let her spirited rays
dazzle my ready body
In an assortment of
iridescent speckles
I would become sunshine
and deliver myself proudly
to those with eyes tenacious enough
to take my fervor in
I would bare myself
with a tinged grace
And bow often to my stares
of marvel
No one would shade me
They’d only lie still for a taste
of warmth not meant to be felt
But to be taken in fully

Nine to Five

Inspiration: Trying to come up with a poem
Word: Anything

I couldn’t come up with anything
My mind was robbed of everything important
And my thoughts had no nectar
And dripped dry
There was no tingle
Giving way to new ideas
Only a thick lump
That sat somewhere between
My heart and throat
I could write it off as anxiety
But this was more outrageous
I’d grown far from my originality
My creativity
My stern will to explore
My curiosity
I was losing me
I lost my meat
I gave it up for the regular
Nothing exquisite or spectacular
Just to be seen and perceived
As one of those ordinary


Inspiration: Thinking about a place where you don’t feel comfortable, reminded me of jail, although I don’t believe that everyone in jail is a disaster
Word: Comfort 

There was no sense of comfort there
Only anxious knees
And thought- belligerent disasters
Waiting to further be destroyed 
and internalized into nothing 


Inspiration:Thinking about what we do with our unconscious mind
Word: Unconscious

Sip on my unconscious dream
And deliver my disclosed thoughts
To my protected soul,
So I may gain freedom

Monday, December 19, 2011

The Thumbsucker

Inspiration: Thinking about the days when I use to suck my thumb
Word: Ease

She relied on it for
it provided an always promising
it brought along unhidden
and delivered her from being like the
it allowed her to sit comfortably
at ease
and this all gave her peace


Inspiration: Thinking about how sometimes when you sit really still, it feels like you are apart of the space and not in it.

Drip down into the black
circle with the curve
tip a little more
creak with the silence
be one like the chameleons
absorb into the scene
and practice remote moment
becoming nothing
in everything
surrender fully
to the will of your own measure
accept the forbidden
and begin to live with the knowing
become free in the practice
and dismantle all lingering grief

Aunt Sarah

Inspiration: Listening to Nina Simone's Four Girls
Word: Force

They called her Aunt Sarah.
She was the corner stone of black women
mimicked often, at other's faulty attempts to exude power
She was quick,
mostly with wit,
and lavished in respect
due to her uncanny will
to be nothing other than grace;
but not still grace,
or the kind that sat upright,
but graceful in the sense
that everything she did
had a fineness to it
She never walked with light feet,
but firm and apparent
She stood with bruises
that were sure to break her
but she was far from broken
Her face was etched with lines
that were more than stories
but experiences
She was strength
and epitomized what it meant
to take heed in her God given power
to be more than a woman
and more than black
but to be a force
shaken only by God himself
and they called her Aunt Sarah

Family Dinner

Inspiration:Thinking of this event that I went to, where everyone seemed so phony and pristine.
Word: Aloofness

The scene had a petty aloofness
it crowded at the seams
with ignorance and unordinary thought
meager begs for one to listen
corrupt skillfully
as mindless matters
ooze into the dried creases of ears


Inspiration: Thinking about accepting the fact that I am an outcast.
Word: Welcome

I have tendencies
unlike yours
I revoked my normality
to harness the unwinding
nature of my person

I take off my shame flooded corpse
and drown wondrously in the unright
essence swelling from the bottom of my feet

Stretching I fully embrace the love
given to me, by welcoming me

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Can I sing America?

Inspiration: Thinking of Langston Hughes Poem, I too sing America
Word: Conflicted

Can I say
that I'm dignified
because I too
am a darker brotha'
and I too, sing America,
but Can I say
that I'm dignified
When I only understand
the speakings of a white song
My own has been lost
too heavily assimilated into
a blood culture for
me to sing that spirtural song
that chant that you were saved from
that chant that we were made from
made our own
and became it
But now I, we, are conflicted
with what song to sing
what soul to be
whats left to be
and how to be

House of Mirrors

Inspiration: The overly pompous students at my school.
Word: Allowed

I allowed your thoughts
to become my presence
I got lost in the falsity
of your slander
I became adorned
with the grief of your lies
and the unhappiness in your life
I lived as a victim
of you misplaced judgment
I felt like rubbish
knowingly distraught
in a cacophony of

With a new day

Inspiration: Wakingn Up
Word: Freedom


A hundred of the same

Inspiration: Looking at people's sorority pictures on fb
Word: Same

same face
same heads
same grace
same heart
same mind
same thought
same life

Thursday, December 15, 2011


Inspiration: I was falling into sleep and for a moment right after I got woken up, I thought I was at home
Word: Sometimes

Sometimes I lay real still
and imagine being home

Sometimes rio talks in her sleep
and rocks and kick her fee

Sometimes my back will hurt
heavy and tired

Sometimes I'll take a nap
15, in cycles

Sometimes I'll sleep a little
dream a little too

Sometimes I'll have a reoccurring one
cry and holler for a few

Sometimes I'll have a thought
I'll get up and write some lines

Sometimes I'll feel inspired
and sip on some wine

Sometimes I'll laugh a little
and hurt away the tears

Sometimes I'll  start rhymin'
and jump in with a dance

Sometimes I'll keep writin'
thoughts walking in my head

Sometimes I'll finally ease
my way back into sleep

Sometimes I'll have a good dream
and feel descended in sweet slumber

I Wonder

Self Love

Inspiration: Thinking of the character Janie in my favorite book
Word: Janie

Everyone thought Janie grinned for Teacake
but I think she grinned for herself
See I think she was willfully lost
in her constant love for herself,
the knowing of it never disappearing
although it was once stolen
(tried to be)
but just long enough
for her to know the worth in it

See I believe Janie grinned for Janie
because life took her lover
and she loved harder with bestowed wisdom
I believe Janie grinned for Janie
because she learned the beauty in gray waters
and dipped freely into bitter life
understanding the outbreak of newness
that would be tomorrow
I believe Janie loved for Janie
because she knew only her one love
and Gods love
could console tighter that the makings
of any outward connection

Bright Light

Inspiration: Looking directly into my lamp

Peer timidly into the whiteness of the strain
squint with focus into the hurting distance
Embrace the pain
evoke it
when the ache hits you
fuck it
it robbed you
you knows it

The Gossiper

Inspiration: I took off my bracelets and they made a smiley face like this 8 O
Word: Open

          op en
            w i d e

Felt obliged -to say it
obligated -to derate it
mere thoughts
of the receding
exalting into the humbled hearts
of the wise
revealing truth,
swallowed up bullshit too

Killed Intrepidity

Inspiration: Thinking of something that was broken, but not shattered
Word: Hung

I stepped on the broken
crushing the already spineless
drooping the wilted
I hung like black knees

My broken's apparent
but my souls never shattered

There was a laugh

Inspiration: I writing this really short, to the point poems
Word: Buried

Laugher did exist in her
but buried.
Etched into a place
where no wrath sat

Black Sheep

Inspiration: Letting my thoughts wonder, How I feel at Mizzou
Word: Inverted

Inverted criminals
outwardly hidden
like diamonds

Scratch It

Inspiration: My leg was itchy

built up

Outward Girl

Inspiration: This photo

She was naked
breast prominent
still face
waiting eyes
fixed gaze
skin clean
lips frigid
present bags
tears apparent
lost smile
cheated face
glare steady
yearned embrace

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Rhytmhic Blues

Inspiration: That great feeling of being weightless
Words: Culminating

Rhythm and Blues
were like a climatic funnel of deliverance
one sparking with quick pulses of culminating discloser
the other eroding vastly
into the massaged cushion of

One Blood

Inspiration: Thinking of the word Blood, Jesus, and the Rwanda Genocide
Word: Blood


Keep Me Nameless

Inspiration: Moving things around
Word: Words

Cut my words around in disorder
dismantle the poison in my lips
or let me self-destruct
like that famous monster did

Sunday, December 11, 2011


Inspiration: Thinking of At Last by Etta James
Word: Free

Effervescent deliverance
sprang from the crossing
where my thighs met

I was free
and like Etta
my love
had come along
but not in the shape of a man,
or a woman for that matter-

but see I was what mattered
knowing me, and
who I is
was the biggest deliverance
myself could give me

Now, in this moment
no soul could tempt me
into lovin' them, more than myself,
healin' them while neglectin' my health

I have come along
at last, at last
my life, is now a song
became it.
I will
sing a simple melody
led and chorused,
by me
love hangs, around my neck
and this sweet notion
gives me peace

The loneliness
had shown me bliss
I learned to take comfort in it,
the silence
it was almost simple minded it
but it's cleared away gray skies
and delivered highly present lines
of blue
a rich blue creating a haze
that felt good to be burnt by

To relieve, relive really,
the tantalizing touch of the glaze
I melt like cold ice in the Sahara
dripping happily into a puddle
of my own surrender
into the subtleness of tranquility

Through the terror of the beast,
I was able to find
an untouched beauty

Monday, December 5, 2011

I am the underdog

Inspiration: Someone asked me for a college textbook for free...?
Word: Poor

am a poor man
in a rich man's world

am a quiet man
in a loud man's land

am a still man
in a quick man's field

am an unlearned man
in a lettered man's universe

am an unfit man
in a fit man's arena

am an ugly man
in a good looking man's society

am an imperfect man
in a perfect man's realm

am a content man
in an unhappy man's world


Inspiration: I don't know, I guess thinking about why we forgive
Word: Forgiveness

There is laughter in the sound of forgiveness
sometimes a hint of pity
but pitied laughter doesn't create ease

Friday, December 2, 2011


Inspiration:Thinking about writing figuratively
Word: Pain

I wish I could write away the pain
have enough ink to illustrate-
the endless steep, 
of bare notions
unable to be explained
but something like nothingness,
and a tinge of lonely-
people who don't really know me 
Maybe a drop of fear?
and a couple of spot on tears. 

I wish I could tell it,
story book like
maybe a ghost
and a black night?
That gets all fixed in the end,
mamma tucks her sweetly in bed
and kisses he head.

Or perhaps with cartoons,
all moving rapidly 
too quick to notice shit
or the depths of regret
just fixin' all their mess
with a snap
and a few clicks-

If I clicked my heels
where would I go?
I have no home to know
nobody who knows
the roots 
of my soul

I tell it broken
harsh blunt 
no bullshit
no sprinkles of sugar
no bushes to erode it
I've been through hood shit 
sung my name in vain 
disgraced my fame
(I'm riddled with shame)
the only thing I paint
is the makings of my face
as I attempt to imitate 
a person with grace 

This is the beginning 
not the end though
shit gets real though
and fear has no window
so sit back 
park your cadillac  
couter vagina or scrotum
yea I said that
and listen 
not hear
fuck hearin'
just listen. 


Inspiration: Thinking about how we tend to let peoples thoughts alter our emotions 
Word: Thoughts 

I allowed your thoughts
to become my presence 
I got lost in the falsity 
of your slander
I became adorned
with the grief of your lies
and the unhappiness in your life
I lived as a victim
of your misplaced judgment 
I, felt as rubbish 
knowingly distraught
to ringed out 
for positive thoughts
I gave you my power
sold you my passion 
I loosened my pride
and abided by none
So heavily, I hung
no rope 
no ties
just by
white lies 

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Exit List

Inspiration: My feelings towards Mizzou
Word: Escape

Can I escape?
just riddle
behind the masses
bold and black
from being that
Just coexist
with the non existent
be persistent'
I wanna be like
the forbidden
just unspoken
and fun livin'
wanna get cloudy
like in heaven
sorry now
I'm beggin'
I just want to be allowed
to get busy
and create clouds
to breathe
in my own scent
without feelin' like a
I just want to be
and unseen
with no deals
not apparent

Still Mind

Inspiration: Having anxiety.
Word: Calm

All I ever wanted
was to feel it
with ease
could I ever be so gifted
could such beauty be granted
could my fearfulness relinquish
my spirt,
and allow me
to indulge eagerly
in such a sweet


Inspiration: That same lady began to play her drum.

quick quick stop
jam dance
move grove
jame rock dance move
unwind, rewind
quick jam dance move
wiggle laugh dance
smile dance jam
laugh dance jam

dance laugh dance laugh grove

Fondle My Drum

Inspiration: This lady walked pass me with a drum.
Word: Beat

Beat my drum
make me come
with ease
taste my
dance love
dance love
beat the works
of my drum

Love in quick time

Inspiration: I want to write it like one of those flip sketch books that tells a story.
Word: Look

turn, look

no touch

heat look stare
stuck one