Saturday, August 25, 2012

Divided Life

Inspiration: This book I'm reading about Henrietta Lacks
Word: Torn

I feel like another part of my life
has been torn from my heart
and my soul be diluted
and flat like cooled hot water
I feel like I've been stretched open
and cut unwilling
like Henrietta

I feel like my tears be endless,
I shed the Sahara

Sometimes I get lost in daydreams
to cultivate new dreams

I can only hope that my torn lives
multiply, like heres did
and love for something
better? Like here ded

I thought I was empty once
that empty felt much better

My pit of black be lonesome
but it shines more vividly
than daybreak suns

My cave is etched with pillars
of heartbreak and isolation

The walls painted heavy
with over thought confusion

The floor burns bright
and catalyzes compulsive upsetting thoughts

I call this place calm

I sit neatly placed at my desk
quieter than that sick silence
so my ears ring of deafening screams
and unprint worthy violence

My hands be numbed
no longer strong enough to lace
just cuff

They be fulfillin' their mission for us
I've been thought down
into an unfair fore-sought destiny

Mothers had more of a dream for me
my torn lives be slabbed on
petri dishes or profited on
by the lawless lords

I wonder if they'll see the moon
or distill into the air
chocking the breathe of dead land
or if they'll revolutionize a society
be noteworthily uncredited
to the hearts that they were torn from

I wonder what might become
of we
I wonder if we might multiply
rather than divide
I wonder if we might reclaim
our torn lives

You Promised Me

Inspiration: In light of all the current foolery of the world.
Word: Promise

I feel lighter than money
cool, im sippin' it
                                         ----the cool say

I dreamed a dream of cool passion
and moon sent 
delivered in deliverance
I heal through membrance

"We couldn't see the stars
so we threw up our own" he said

Now we got our own
killin' our own- I read

Books explain why the crooks
be crooks
and why my people's smiles stay

We be hooked-in
the imagery of
the broke-in

that's that reality tv shit

fuckin' with our perception
got us thinkin' real is
a cold bed of
wanders tryin' to find a found dream

haunted on the backs of open legs
and hands throwin' up
callin' oneself supreme
uncommonly common is the new theme

Frank Ocean said it was a one man's cause
so he must not fuck with that one man's laws

And I be scorn again
be that angry black woman
because I can't become
the remedy, of a broken reality

that shit dead

What if I shot the sheriff
for all the misbled blood
and hung him high
enough to see

dead little girl's panties
danglin' on trees

and bodies being broke open
by aimless cylinders ablaze
led by lost thoughts
trailed by troubled haze

and mother's hearts falling
quicker than running teardrops
while their worries run faster
tryin' to make way

And who said Sodom and Gomorrah
was all that damn bad
I much rather live amongst free love
than the land of the dead

And aint that where we is
with all this self-denying finger pointing

We be sippin' on that maddening world-
What she say?

"I don't hear [shit] but maddening screams
and the soft strains of death..."

You promised me

a freedom
postto insure some blessing of liberty
said if I agree I'd be insured domestic tranquility
the best lie was the promotion of general welfare

because the lawless lawmakers
don't care

thus I've created a new promise
deviated from a blood country's platform norm

aint no need to confirm or follow
my promise aint ratified by the heartless or hollow
merely a claim for my stolen dignity

So, fuck a promise
I'll claim my own free


Inspiration: My favorite movies.
Word: Watch

I want to watch Drumline
and Save the Last Dance
sing along with the Temptations
and shout with the Five Heartbeats
I wanna do the washer machine with Selena
and hoop with Monica
I want to fall in love With The King
and be dazzled like Anna
I want to be marveled by the life of Billie
Sing a little blues too
I'd love to ride the bleak with Juno
and get lifted with Craig and Smokey
I wanna have a walk on beaches
and see the garden of Edward
I'd love to get bad with my bads
and Set it Off
then cry a little bit with Doughboy
I want to hurt with my Sister's Keeper
and be romanced by Love Jones
I want to feel classic hip hop
and beautiful in Brown Sugar
and be troubled by 13
I wanna live that thug lyfe
in Claudine
and Wait to Exhale
I wanna eat spaghetti
toppled with syrup
and find the meaning of family
with Elf
I want to learn the backstroke
and swim good in Pride
I wanna love Jenny like Forrest
and run myself to Freedom
I wanna dance dirty and
come out of my corner
I want to find where my broken is
and make it into A funny Story